Am I to Blame (new details added)?

You seem to want to be to blame! You say his whole day's worth of behaviour was your fault, caused by you crying, when you only started whining at about 11pm. Are you seriously allowing that one to stand? His whole days behaviour was in revenge because you were going to cry about it later on? He somehow knew you were going to cry late that evening so he was justified in being an ar.se all day? (well actually with his nasty behaviour, YES he knew you would cry. He arranged it by being an ar.se all day!) COME ON! He is clearly an A grade b4stard and you are being willfully stupid. You are going to guilt trip yourself into giving him your kid and letting him take all the money too at this rate. YES you need to stop being a professional victim, you are so pive agressive its silly, but you must stop taking the blame for everything he does. Do you ENJOY it or something? If you cant get any other attention, then being shouted at and blamed for not being his ex wife will do for you? What in hell do you actually WANT from this situation? He is NOT going to change, specially when you act like you do, you want love and respect while being all soggy and whining about all over the place instead of being strong and kicking his useless ar.se to the curb. No one respects someone who begs, whines etc. Respect YOURSELF and stop sucking up all the blame in the world like an old testament martyr! They only got respect after they were dead and only from religious fanatics! WHY stay around for this when you get it proved to your face time and time again that he does NOT care about you, for you, or for any single thing you say or do? Do YOU even care about you? You dont seem to. You seem to want to cause him to grind you into dust beneath his feet in order to be able to whine about how bad you have it, and get attention and sympathy for it! Let me tell you, if you want to have a topic of conversation to gain sympathy from, martyrdom doesnt get you ANY. My mum's been at it for YEARS and no one wants to speak to her anymore. Try bunions, it works for Victoria Beckham.